The Importance of Forgiveness in Prayer

As we continue studying Jesus' model prayer for us in Matthew 6:9-15, we now come to the second three petitions of the prayer: requests for daily bread, forgiven debts, and the avoidance of temptation. All three, interestingly enough, deal with man's need.

It is amazing to consider that this all-knowing, all powerful, ever-present God who created the entire universe would have any interest in us personally. But He does! And it is rooted out of His tremendous love for you.

Acknowledging God as the Giver.
"Give us this day our daily bread" (v. 11).

This part of the "model prayer" is not only a place where we ask God for something. It also serves as an affirmation that everything we have ultimately comes from Him. James 1:17 states, "Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning."

Yes, we can work hard, save and wisely invest our money, buy our own food and clothes, and pay for our own houses, but the very ability to do this comes from God! Scripture also says, "But remember the LORD your God, for it is He who gives you the ability to produce wealth. . ." (Deuteronomy 8:18 NIV).

God Almighty has committed Himself to personally
meeting the needs of His children.

Romans 8:32-"He who did no spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?"

Philippians 4:19, "And my God shall supply all you need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."

2 Corinthians 9:10-11, "Now He who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness. You will be made rich in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God."

Psalm 37:25-"I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread."

Seeking God's Forgiveness
"Forgive us our debts" (v. 12a).

This verse can also be translated, "Forgive us our sins, trespasses, shortcomings, resentments, what we owe to you, or anything wrong that we have done."

Some think that they do not need forgiveness. But according to Jesus in this "model prayer," it's something we should be asking for on a regular basis. Scripture says, "If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us" (1 John l:8). The Apostle Paul himself writes, "Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me" (Philippians 3:12).

Those who do not see constant need for regular cleansing are not spending much time in God's presence. Someone once said, "The greater the saint, the greater is the sense of sin and the awareness of sin within."

Forgiving Others
"[A]s we forgive our debtors." (v. 12b).

According to Jesus, a generous and constant forgiveness of others should be the natural result of our understanding of the forgiveness that God has extended to us. A man once said to the English preacher, John Wesley, "I never forgive and I never forget." To which Wesley responded, "Then Sir, I hope you never sin."

In many ways, forgiveness is the key to healthy, strong, and lasting relationships with others. We are going to hurt one another—whether it be intentional or unintentional— because as fatally flawed people, we are going to sin. That is why we must learn to forgive.

When there is no forgiveness, a root of bitterness begins to grow. And when a root of bitterness grows, it destroys that relationship. Hebrews 12:15 speaks of this destructive nature of bitterness: ". . . Looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled."

Today, society seems to exalt vengeance over forgiveness. We see many who live by the adage, "Don't get mad—get even!" Yet, harboring unforgiveness in your life can eat you up spiritually and even bring your spiritual growth to a standstill. Unforgiveness is choosing to love hate. It produces bitterness, malignancy, anger, rage, anxiety, and depression. Simply put, it is sin. That is why Jesus included the need to forgive others in this prayer.

The Bible gives 75 different word pictures for forgiveness. Included among those . . .

—Forgiveness is like writing "canceled" over a debt.

—Forgiveness is like taking a piece of pottery that resembles something that someone has done to you and smashing it into a million pieces so that it can never be remembered again.

Three Reasons to Forgive

Since Jesus placed such an emphasis on forgiveness, you would think that forgiving others would easily be at the top of our list of priorities. Unfortunately, that is not the case. Pastor John McArthur has come up with three unique reasons, or incentives for forgiving others.

#1) You are never more like God than when you forgive.

As it has been said, "To err is human, but to forgive is divine." We sing, "Make me more like You, Lord, make me like You." Then we must forgive!

In Exodus we read, "Now the LORD descended in the cloud and stood with him [Moses] there, and proclaimed the name of the LORD. And the LORD passed before him and proclaimed, 'The LORD, the LORD God, merciful and gracious, longsuffering, and abounding in goodness and truth, keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin . . ." (Exodus 34:6-7).

Do you want to know who God is? He is compassionate, gracious, slow to anger, full of lovingkindness, and full of truth. He also forgives iniquity, transgression, and sin. Our God is a forgiving God.

God's forgiveness then requires our forgiveness of others. The Bible says, "And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you" (Ephesians 4:32).

Remember, Jesus taught us to pray, "Your will be done on earth, as it is in heaven" (v. 10). What goes on in heaven? The worship of God, the lifting up of Christ, and the granting of forgiveness are all taking place in heaven right now. And that is what we should be doing here on earth.

Matthew 18:18 says, "Whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven." This verse is not talking about binding and loosening Satan, as some have suggested. Instead, it means that if someone is sinning, and you confront that person about his sin, and that individual repents and you forgive him—heaven has already done that. You are just lining up with heaven. If they do not repent, however, they are bound in that sin—and heaven confirms that, as well. You are literally bringing heaven down to earth when you forgive others.

#2. It is only reasonable that those who are forgiven forgive.

Jesus was speaking on the topic of forgiveness when Peter asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" And Jesus answered, "I tell you not seven times, but seventy times seven" (Matthew 18:21-22).

Jesus then tells Peter the story of a man who had apparently refused to pay his taxes (see Matthew l8:23-35). He was a tax collector for the king, and he was supposed to collect a certain amount for the king, after which he was allowed to keep some money back for himself. But this man kept it all! As a result, he owed the king ten thousand talents. One writer said that would roughly equal the national gross income of Galilee. In spite of this massive amount of money, the king pardons the man and completely forgives him of his debt. This tax collector, however, fails to show the same kindness to his fellow man. He finds a man who owes him one hundred denarii (about three months wages), and demands payment of the debt. When the slave pleads for mercy, he is thrown into prison. Upon hearing about the tax collector's actions, the king reverses his decision and throws the man into prison until he has paid in full.

When we read this story, it is easy to point fingers at the tax collector. But we must take this lesson to heart. Jesus is saying that a forgiven person must forgive. It is only reasonable that if you have been forgiven a massive debt to God, you can forgive a small one for man. He forgave you an unpayable debt. Are you going to take all of the forgiveness of God and give none of your own?

#3. Failure to forgive results in chastening.

Returning to the story in Matthew 18, Jesus closes with the parable with this: "When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened. Then the master called the servant in. 'You wicked servant,' he said, 'I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?' In anger his master turned him over to the jailers until he should pay back all he owed. This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart. "

Failure to forgive results in divine chastening. You will be tortured by your own bitterness and resentment and personal separation from fellowship with God because of your unconfessed sin. In essence, when you choose not to forgive, you are usurping the authority of God. Not only are you disobeying Scripture, but you are taking the place of God Himself: "Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, 'Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,' says the Lord. Therefore 'if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head.' Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good" (Romans 12:19-21).

We as Christians should never take revenge. In fact, instead of wanting revenge, we are to extend mercy and kindness.

Yes, forgiveness is important in prayer (see also Matthew 5:23-24). Don't wait to forgive until you feel like doing it. Remember how God has forgiven you, then ask the Holy Spirit to help you take that first step towards forgiveness.